Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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