I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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