My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
