So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
