Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
