I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Randomize
