what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
