that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize