oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
where am i from again
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
They left me at home... I'm a liability
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize