I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
