did you get engaged???
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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