I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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