I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Randomize
