..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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