belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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