Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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