Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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