I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
