Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
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