i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Randomize
