this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
