I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
your room smells of hookers.
And success
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
