So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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