That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
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