You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Randomize
