There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
