Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
