I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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