Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
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