glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
