i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
