Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
