i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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