it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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