its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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