i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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