Yo dont text me then not text me
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
