East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Randomize
