He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize