You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Holy sore nipples Batman
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
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