Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
there was a trapeze. enough said
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Randomize
