highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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