Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
operation have a gay friend backfired
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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