So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
