We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Randomize
