if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
