roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
