so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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