he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Randomize