ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
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